When my publisher asked me to write about this topic, I immediately thought, am I that desperate. Unfortunately, the answer came back in the affirmative. It seems that we as a race, despite splitting the atom, curing a bunch of deadly diseases and creating drive through dining, are still obsessed with our genitals. I blame it on Darwin, not personally, he was the son of a vicar after all. But on evolution and all the stuff going on inside our guts and brains. We cannot get past squishy wet pussies and hard cocks. Even, a trip to the moon in a high-powered rocket, is not enough to pull out of the gravity belt of our pornographic imaginations.
Sex in Space: It’s Coming
It should really be titled “Sex in Space: Are You Coming?” Major Tom was up there for a long while and, obviously, had some problems. Of course, he didn’t have any earthly company up there, did he. Wherever science takes us human beings, we want to do something dirty in all that clean white space. But hang on, space is black isn’t it. Maybe space makes you horny, cause it is dark and stuff up there. More likely, it makes you horny because it is mind numbingly boring out there.
My publisher just reminded me to include his line about, “spherical globules of semen floating around the space cabin”. I truly think that he has sex on the brain 24/7, and that, perhaps, he remains a frustrated writer, despite his overwhelmingly avaristic inclinations. Returning to the topic at hand, space travel and one-way trips to Mars, will they challenge the space monkeys to go at it like rabbits? Sex and death are two poles of the one conundrum. Will we see a karmically-asphyxiated sense of the erotic permeating the intergalactic coach?
Will hookers ply their trade on these Intersolar system craft? A first-ever paid sexual transaction in space? Do STIs and Gonorrhoea survive in outer space? What about the herpes virus? Probably, I imagine they might have all journeyed here to Earth from somewhere else. I remember someone once telling me that mushrooms, the fungi spores, originally came here on a meteor. In space no one can hear you scream. What about a loud orgasm? Getting in and out of those space suits might be a hassle, I reckon. Sex in space: It’s coming, to a cinema near you. Mars and Venus. Dick and Jane. The Jupiter Two. Warning Will Robinson. Don’t panic, don’t panic…